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Kwerkus Ilf
Mutually Assured Distraction
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Posted - 2007.11.06 20:45:00 -
[1]
Edited by: Kwerkus Ilf on 06/11/2007 20:48:09
Got annoying enemies that you canÆt quite stomp? ****ed off at those smack-talking carebear blobbers the next system over? Perhaps you want to soften up a system in advance of your own operations. Maybe you just hate someone and want to ruin their day while remaining anonymous...
As long as your foes are in low-sec BEES can help by bringing a little of that Amamake flavor right to their doorstep. For a fee we will install ourselves in the system of your choice for up to a week of pillaging, griefing, and general havoc-wreaking. Unlike normal mercenary contracts which involve camping tactics, cumbersome contracts, and lengthy negotiations, we will get in their fast and pirate the crap out of EVERYTHING in the system and surrounding area throughout the period of the contract.
Ever tried ratting, running missions, even just jumping gates when pirates are around? It gets tiring really fast. Unlike normal merc contracts, you can't use alts to avoid pirates. We shoot everything! So: for the cost of a couple of T2 fit battleships you can now bring the same levels of frustration to your favorite Eve buddies.
How is it so cheap? Contract Pirating is inexpensive for you because we are able to draw resources from all pilots in the target area rather than relying entirely on your fee. We pirate all day in the Amamake area anyway, so the only real cost to us moving to a new system.
Interested? HereÆs what we need from you:
Target system (will include the surrounding area within +/- 5 jumps)
Target corporations/alliance
5 mil/jump from Amamake installation fee
10mil/day while BEES are installed
20% of the cost of damages inflicted on the target corp(s) (calculated based on Eve-Kill prices)
War declaration fees (only if we deem them necessary)
We are willing to negotiate a cap on damages inflicted if you need to limit the total cost of the operation (afraid we might inflict too much damage?). All other costs are fixed. No negotiations mean that we can be installed fast, usually within 48 hours of notification about the contract.
As always, feel free to swing by Amamake 3-1 for a free demonstration.
http://bees.eve-kill.net/
BONUS: As part of our introductory extravaganza we will be waiving the installation fees on our first contract. Get in touch with Termina, Jed Stark, or Kwerkus Ilf if you are interested.
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Kwerkus Ilf
Mutually Assured Distraction
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Posted - 2007.11.06 21:27:00 -
[2]
 Originally by: Jacob Castillo
you might want to change the size of that banner, it breaks the forums :S
Good luck though.
Ah, thanks for the tip, m8. Will fix it!
-K
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Kwerkus Ilf
Mutually Assured Distraction
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Posted - 2007.11.07 02:39:00 -
[3]
Edited by: Kwerkus Ilf on 07/11/2007 02:40:19
Originally by: VicturusTeSaluto
I'll pay to send you guys far off so that you do not scare my targets ;)
Good hunting.
Lol, good point. We won't be accepting any contracts that are obviously designed to keep us in backwater, uninhabited systems just to keep us out of the way :) Hilarious idea though.
As for Rens 911: we miss you guys. Come on back and police Amamake again. It's always fun to have people gunning for us and we all got some fun fights out of it :)
-K
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Kwerkus Ilf
Mutually Assured Distraction
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Posted - 2007.11.07 20:56:00 -
[4]
Thx to all the well-wishers. I'll definitely give ken your regards, Vim.
C'mon now people: who wants to deploy some griefage?
-K
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Kwerkus Ilf
Mutually Assured Distraction
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Posted - 2007.11.09 10:19:00 -
[5]
C'mon now, what could be better than hiring pirates to terrorize a system full of people you hate? In case you forget: WE HAVE JED STARK! Dat's all you should need to hear! 
-K
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Kwerkus Ilf
Mutually Assured Distraction
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Posted - 2007.11.12 17:00:00 -
[6]
Edited by: Kwerkus Ilf on 12/11/2007 17:01:53
Think of us as a big yellow and black striped grenade: you chuck it in there and take cover. When the smoke clears things are a lot messier than they were before.
-K
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